Silent Dancing in Public is a Danger to Us All!!! (Satire)

Posted on May 30, 2011

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SILENT DANCING IN PUBLIC
IS A DANGER TO US ALL!!!
By Vicki Robison

SATIRE

Updated at 2:30 pm central time, 05-30-2011

Ringleader Adam Kokesh led a group of peaceful liberty-lovers yesterday, at a peaceful demonstration in the Thomas Jefferson memorial in Washington DC.   And as we all know, people who advocate “liberty”, “freedom”, “Constitutional principles” and “individual rights” are terrorists!  And dancing in public is an act of terrorism! 

Police held the protestors for a while, in an attempt to decide what to do with them.  Said a police department spokesman, “These people are terrorists, and should be treated as terrorists!  We seriously thought about burying them all at sea, but then we thought it would be a better idea to let them all die naturally, and then we’ll pretend to continue hunting them for ten years after each one of them dies.  After the ten years, we’ll send Navy Seals to random homes across the country, pretending to kill the dancing liberty-lovers, and pretending to bury them all at sea.  Not only will it make for good television, it’ll give Americans, everywhere, a re-newed sense of patriotism to get them ready for the next war  waged by the U.S.”

Adam Kokesh has announced that his next dancing act of terror will take place on Saturday, June 4th, at the Jefferson memorial in Washington D.C.  Approximately 500 people have already confirmed that they will also be attending the Dance of Terror, and are presently working on their dance moves, which are sure to cause Americans, everywhere, to shriek in  horror!

A bystander, who barely made it out of the building when the horrific silent dancing began, was asked to tell her experience to a reporter for the Sheep Herder Daily News.  “It was just awful,” she cried.  “First, I saw a man tapping his feet.  That made me nervous, so I turned to walk away, and then, I saw another man shifting back and forth, from foot to foot.  Then I was really scared!  I turned to run, and there was a woman, pointing her fingers in the air like John Travolta in Saturday Night Fever!  I was horrified!  I’ve never been so scared in my life!  As I was running out of the monument, I tripped and fell, and two of those maniacs came over to me and helped me up.  I had no idea what they were going to do to me, so I broke free and ran into the street screaming for the police!”

Said the police spokesmen, “We need to protect this country from these dancing lunatics!  They think they are sharing a message of liberty and individual rights, but people don’t want liberty!  Nor do they want individual rights!  People want to be told what to do, and to be abused by their superiors when they don’t comply!  People want to have their homes broken into by law enforcement, without just cause!  They want to pay 20% to 50% — or more — in income taxes, sales taxes and various other taxes!  They want to go broke at the gas pumps, send their children to fight endless wars, and pay their bills with money which isn’t backed by anything of value!  They want fines and penalties if they don’t comply!  They want their president to have a license to kill and they want the government to be able to listen to their private conversations and read their e-mails!  That’s why we have the Patriot Act!  We’re simply giving Americans what they want!”

The American Sheeple Society (A.S.S.) has condemned Kokesh and his gang of liberty lovers.  “What we need in this country,” remarked president of A.S.S., Ima Pawn, “is more people who obey the establishment!  If the TSA tells you to take off your clothes and bend over, it would be criminal not to do so!  If the President tells you to pay 100% of your income in taxes, it’s your duty as an American to do so!  We need to abolish terrorism everywhere — even if we have to sell our souls to do it!”

 END SATIRE

To read the real story, click the following link:  U.S. Iraq War Veteran, and Others, Arrested at Thomas Jefferson Memorial for Peaceful Protest

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